What Would Jesus Blog?
Seriously. If he were to blog today, turn off the “Mythbusters” DVD Thomas is watching, shut the office door to wall out the noise of the Sons of Thunder, plunk himself down at a computer, what would he have to say?
Would he talk about the bombings at the Boston Marathon? Would he point out atrocities and give soothing words to the hurt? Or would he hit the caps lock, and shout BOMB THEM ALL AND LET GOD SORT THEM OUT! And money… He once called it Mammon, and it has been said it is the root of all evil. Would he say something about how Fox News lamented how the Boston Marathon bombings caused the Dow Jones Industrial Average to tank, not even 90 minutes after the explosions? Seriously. What would Jesus blog?
Would he have something to say about gun control? Would he lambast Congress, and tell them our constitutional right to bear AR-15s and AK-47, and to stand up a state militia, outweighs the thousands of gun deaths per year? Or would he align his writing with those folks whose parents, children, or animals have been shot? What, seriously, would he decide to blog?
Ooh–or here’s a tough one. Would he eat, drink and stay at the home of his married lesbian friends? Would he blog about it? Or would he keep quiet so as not to ruffle the status quo? Maybe he’d go so far as to condemn them in an online post, and never darken their doorstep again, for the audacity to invade the sanctity of marriage. I don’t know. What would Jesus decide, seriously, to blog?
Would he point out how Al Gore is a weenie, and anyone with half a brain will see what a hypocrite he is for urging us to live a carbon-neutral life, all while flying hundreds of thousands of miles per year in a private jet? Or would he ask us to consider, for a moment, that if we tear apart our planet, we won’t have many other places to live, so do the best you can to make it livable for our grandchildren?
Would he set up a New Blogger’s theocracy, that will be the New New Testament, from whose knowledge we all worship, or else *lightning bolt*? Would he confront the Church, and the government for its excesses, and shortsightedness? Or would he praise them for the excellent work they’ve done, keeping things well-tended in his two-millennium absence? Would he give us a report card, like the Health Insurance companies do for doctors and hospitals?
I don’t have any answers, because, of course, I am not Jesus. I’m just me. And I know what I’d think. What do you think?
Seriously. What would Jesus blog, if he were here today?